Memories

I went to school today because Mr. Devakumar asked me to speak to the 12C students about Business Battle. I know for a fact that I cannot help them in anyway but I decided to go primarily because I wanted to sort of re-live the experience. Needless to say that I had great fun organizing Business Battle - whether it be Jaich insulting the computer teacher on her face or Naveen yelling at me for being thoroughly disorganized or trying to convince the teachers that Shriram shoudn't host the quiz (I don't think he has forgiven me for that) or having 'secret' meetings or fuming when certain people acted irresponsibly...

Having said all this, I think what I liked best about Business Battle was that I made some of my closest friends while organizing it. I am not mentioning names because I know that both of them will be embarrased and because I don't think it means so much to them; but it will suffice to say that without their help it would been the most dreadful time of my life. Thank you.

Another wierd thing about it was that I don't remember how it all came together in the end... the religious person in me would of course attribute it to God, which is another reason why it is special.

All this came rushing back when I opened our Business Battle 'file'. I don't think I helped the 12C students at all... but I still feel happy about all the memories. I know this is a silly, illogical and sentimental post but that is what was intended so I'm not going to justify it. So lets raise our glass to such happy memories....

Legitimacy for Dating...Questions

All of us know at least one person who is 'going out'/'dating' someone so everyone can understand this post. However, if you are going out with someone yourself, then stop. Read no further cause this entry will not interest you and may even irritate you. If you are, on the other hand, still 'single', then please continue reading and do tell me what you think about it.

This entry is a result of some (futile?) discussion on the subject of 'dating'. Admittedly, all of us like/have liked/will like someone. Does that necessarily mean we have to go out with that person? Well, the answer to that is simple - if you like someone, it implies that you enjoy their company and so you will want to spend more time with them and going out is one way of doing that. Fair enough. But what if you are already good friends with the person you like and spend a lot of time with her/him? [I request the reader to not misconstrue the above or what follows as an indication of my romantic interests. I have none AT THE MOMENT and am merely groping about in the realm of theory] In that case, the argument that you will get to spend more time with her/him fails.

The other argument advanced is that by dating someone, you'll have the feeling that that someone is 'there for you'. I have two disagreements with this argument - one, I would say, at the risk of being cynical, that since most of these relationships break sooner or later, usually sooner (I concede that there are some relationships that don't break but I maintain that these are only the exceptions) there is more pressure on one or both parties to 'keep it going'. Therefore, far from being reassuring, it actually leaves you in doubt - does she/he really like me or has her/his liking for me decreased etc. The second disagreement is at a spiritual level - if you are looking for reassurance, if you want to feel that someone is always there for you, wouldn't it be a better option to rely on something permanent like God or a Superior Force (assuming you believe in one) rather than relying on ephemeral things and getting hurt when they are less permanent than you thought they were? I am not going to discuss this issue with regard to atheists because I haven't given enough thought to it.

The third argument is that dating is fun. Quite frankly, I cannot counter this since (a) fun is a subjective standard so I cannot speak for anybody else - for e.g. if a person thinks getting pierced is fun, then it is so for her/him, I can't dispute it just because it is not fun for me(b) since I haven't dated anyone myself, I can't tell whether dating would be fun for me, according to my standard (this applies to 'you won't know how great it is because you haven't tried it' as well).

So when people say that they have a 'meaningful' relationship, do they mean they are having fun or that is reassuring or both? I certainly don't understand the reassuring part for the reasons given above. So where is the legitimacy for dating? Before you think I am living in a different universe, I have confession to make - I have "asked out" a person myself but haven't dated; in less sophisticated terms, she didn't say yes. So you think this post is just out of frustration? Well, in my defense, I have thinking about this off and on for a long time so it isn't necessarily because of frustration. But why did I "ask her out" when I wasn't convinced of the legitimacy of dating? I have nothing to say in my defense - I was indeed being a hypocrite.
Finally, I would like to 'solicit' your opinion on this matter although you may think I am totally weird for thinking about such things. I am not able to accept it completely though it seems to be the trend today and I think it is essential that we question at least this part of the 'dominant discourse' (it is post-modern jargon).

[P.S. This post has not been written by Ranjani - it should have been obvious (in her posts, you won't find words struggling to make sentences; sentences forced into paragraphs; and paragraphs made into a whole agaisnt their will) but nonetheless...